Friday, April 01, 2011

Be My Fantasy

Now is my favorite time of year. Another exciting NCAA basketball tournament is getting close to wrapping up, major league baseball is starting and golf's Masters tournament begins in less than a week. While all of these are great sporting events, they offer more. Each event offers an opportunity to gamble, and more importantly, the opportunity to annoy Chad with discussion of your gambling. There's nothing Chad likes to hear more about than your NCAA bracket or your fantasy baseball team.

This year, I have entered into another league that will give me the chance to annoy Chad well into the future. I'm talking about my fantasy politics league. I sat down the other night and drafted a powerful team that I believe will win the league's inaugural title. Our league is a two year league and lasts through the term of the current Congress at the end of 2012. The rules are simple, you get a point for each appearance of a member of your roster on any of the following Sunday morning political shows: Meet the Press, Face the Nation, This Week with David Brinkley's Ghost, Fox News Sunday, or CNN Sunday morning.

Since most political analysis will be on the 2012 Presidential race over the next year and a half, our league awards 3 points for a primary or caucus victory, two for second place and one for third. Barack Obama is not available for any of the teams.

I had the misfortune of drafting sixth. By the time I picked, Sarah Palin, John Boehner, Harry Reid, Newt Gingrich, and Michelle Bachmann were gone. I held my nose and picked Hillary Rodham-Clinton. Mitt Romney was sitting out there, but like fellow Massachusetts draftee David Ortiz in fantasy baseball, Mitt is way overrated. I'd liken Hillary to Justin Morneau. She was once a superstar, but appeared to be beaten to the point that she'd never be the same. I hope both rebound strongly this year. On the swing-around I picked up House Majority Leader Eric Cantor and felt really good about it. I'm sure he'll be on TV a lot this year explaining why he gave away the store.

In the third round I picked Republican Congressman Peter King, hoping he'd ratchet up some xenophobia and make it to TV a lot. The fourth round I reached and picked South Carolina Republican Governor Nikki Haley. Hey, she's got a face for TV and has been accused of having a bunch of affairs. With my last pick, I took Chip Cravaack. He's honest, intelligent and articulate and probably a terrible draft pick. I knew I should have taken John Edwards.