Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Opinions are Like Lame Sports Writers, Everybody's Got One

If it's one thing I hate, it's sports guys popping off about politics. I read sports as a refuge from the constant conservative beat down that is the front page and most MSM political reporting. Plus sports guys typically don't know squat about anything besides sports. They're idiots, only feeling the need to talk about politics because they're bored with a job that typically takes them about 1 hour per day to finish up. And finally, they're always Democrats!

The most painful recent example of this phenomenon, from the highly entertaining and formerly respected Bill Simmons at ESPN previewing tonight's NBA Lottery Determination show.

Comments: Nobody deserves a stroke of lottery fortune less than Glen Taylor and Kevin McHale, the NBA's version of Bush/Rumsfield for 8-10 years. Of course, nobody deserves a stroke of lottery fortune more than KG, one of the few superstars with too much pride to ever bail on a sinking ship. Either that, or they're blackmailing him with a sex tape so he'll stay. But wouldn't it be nice to see KG play the David Robinson to Oden's Tim Duncan for the next 5-6 years? Hence, 10 points for "overdue good karma."

A media guy from Boston, I should have guessed as much. But if I want to get lame second guessing on complex issues of war and foreign policy, I'll read the Star Tribune editorial page. Bad Karma Simmons, may all the Celtics ping pong balls get stuck in the hopper tonight and they end up drafting Spencer Tollackson.

UPDATE: BTW, most egregious abuse of a religious belief by an NBA team ever, the T'Wolves sending guard Randy Foye to be their draft representative, toting some holy water from Lourdes in hopes of improving their position above No.7. What, the Shroud of Turin wasn't available as a rally towel?

UPDATE: The Wolves stay at 7th position! Take that Catholic tradition mockers!

UPDATE: The Celtics FALL 3 positions to number 5, out of the Durant/Oden jackpot! Take that Simmons! It will be a pleasure to read his suffering for at least another half decade of Celtic futility. My work here is done.

The Elder Adds: Perhaps next year the Wolves can have their draft representative wear the magic underwear for better luck.

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