Worst Column Ever?

Dorothy Rabinowitz writes regularly on televison in the Wall Street Journal. Not a bad gig if you can get it, eh? She also purports to be a fan of America's favorite animated family "The Simpsons" and has written about the show in the past.

In Friday's edition of the august paper, she penned a piece noting the airing of The 400th Simpsons episode (sub req) which calls into question both her claim of being a Simpsons fan and her very credibility to comment on television.

In the 400th episode of "The Simpsons" (Sunday, 8:30 to 9 p.m. EDT on Fox), Marge's older sisters, Selma and Patty, make a brief appearance, as do a host of other "Simpsons" characters. The magnificently hostile crones now live, we see, in a deadly looking set of high-rise towers, the Spinster City Apartments, the sight of which sets off, in a viewer's mind, a chain of questions -- just where in Springfield would this housing project be, and how did the sisters get here? Bizarre queries, no doubt, given that "The Simpsons" is a fictional enterprise whose animators can, and do, throw anything they please into Springfield, including the huge python who shows up Sunday. This creature, soon reduced to hopeless reptilian neediness, is Bart's replacement pet for his dog, Santa, temporarily deranged.

His dog "Santa"? C'mon, anyone with the least bit of familiarity with the show knows that Bart's dog is named "Santa's Little Helper" not "Santa." While some of you may accuse me of quibbling on this matter, I believe that it speaks volumes. "Santa's Little Helper" and "Santa" are world's apart in meaning and significance, especially to true fans of the show. An entire episode explained how the family came to acquire the dog and where his name comes from (he was a greyhound "racing" at the dog track).

But even worse than this obvious error is Rabinowitz's judgement of the show:

There is no point trying to figure out how good the series still is. The Simpsons have been with us too long -- a family likely to live in our hearts longer than the Sopranos, possibly because none of them are going to get whacked, because Bart and Homer and Marge and Lisa are always who they've been, because the sun never sets on Springfield and its people. Wonderful indeed.

No, not wonderful indeed. At least not anymore. Seasons Two through Six can accurately be described as "wonderful" and some of the funniest television ever. But there have now been more bad Simpsons episodes than good ones. The show hasn't been watchable in years and to pretend otherwise leads me to question whether Rabinowitz is able to recognize good television at all.

By the way, of the roughly one thousand words that comprise Rabinowitz's column, all but 300 are dedicated to describing what happens in various Simpsons episodes. Like I said, not a bad gig.

UPDATE-- Tom e-mails to add:

The thing I miss the most about the old days was the background sight gags that you could pick up only if you paid close attention (and I don't mean what Bart was writing on the black board each week). A few months ago, I think you noted that the show jumped the shark for you about 3-4 years ago. It jumped the shark for me yesterday when Neal Justin in the Strib praised it in a front page of the Source section. What is it with TV critics and this show? It is all fawning coverage and not questioning a premise that after 18 years is showing some wear. I guess that it will take Ted McGinley guest voicing an Evil Knievel like character that is jumping Lake Springfield spot to get others to the same point.

The funny thing is that I had friends who thought the show went downhill after Season Five. I still think it was solid through Season Six and then started declining, although now an episode from Season Eight is gold compared with the most recent offerings.

I don't know why these critics can't see that and when they continue to insist "it's as funny as ever" they lose all credibility with me.

Tom's right about some of the subtle background stuff in the early years. It was genius. It really pains me to have to rip the show now because I loved what they did in the golden years. They should have hung it up long ago and let us live off our memories (and reruns).

I have a lot of respect for Seinfeld having the ability to recognize when it was over. The last year of "Seinfeld" wasn't as good as the rest, but it wasn't a pale imitation of life either. The Simpsons has been a walking corpse for some time now.