On Frozen Pond

It's January. It's Minnesota. And it's cold. That must mean it's time for the third annual U.S. Pond Hockey Championships. For the second straight year the battle for the Golden Shovel will be played out on the frozen ice of Lake Nokomis in Minneapolis. And for the third straight year, I will be lacing 'em up, although not with the same squad as the previous two years. Apparently there was a registration snafu, the snafu in question being our captain who missed the registration deadline. Lucky for me, another team was looking for a skilled player with experience to fill in. One out of two ain't bad.

This year's tourney may be more about survival than skill anyway. The forecast high for our two games tomorrow is 6 degrees above zero. Which will seem downright balmy compared to Saturday when the HIGH temp for the day is expected to be 3 below zero. We have another two games that day, both before noon which means we'll probably be lucky to see -6. And don't even get me started on the wind chills which are predicted to hit between -28 and -38. There's not a lot of shelter out on the open ice of a lake either.

These are the kind of conditions that separate the men from the boys. And may turn some of the men into boys if they don't protect certain sensitive areas. Lots of layers baby.

If you take a look at the rosters you'll notice a score of familiar names with D1 and even some NHL experience. In the past couple of tourneys, teams loaded with such talent haven't been the ones that came away with the coveted Golden Shovel. However, if you're looking for a squad with a roster that you'll recognize, consider Johnny Upton & Associates:

Nick Checco
Larry Olimb
Brian LaFleur
Dave Paradise
Dusty Anderson
Corey Peterson

Not as many team names stand out this year. You've got the return of "Snakes on the Pond" and the timely "Subprime." But my favorite entry has to be "Big Test Icicles" (think it about--Packer fans may need some assistance), a name which may well be very descriptive of what it takes to survive and thrive on the frozen pond this year.

It's too bad that Hugh is so busy carrying water for Mitt that he can't fulfill his duties as Minnesota Hockey Commissioner on the ice. He could be doing his show live tomorrow from Lake Nokomis. That would truly be Hugh Hewitt On Ice. Oh well, there's always next year. It's not like he'll be doing anything during the Inauguration.