Fraters Libertas

Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum

Sometime tomorrow a plane will touch down somewhere in Arizona and Brad Jones from Infinite Monkeys will emerge, triumphantly waving a piece of paper in his hand and proclaiming that he has secured "peace in our time". He will of course quickly lower his voice, put the paper in his pocket, and furtively steal away once the TSA agents notice him and begin to close in. But he has apparently succeeded in his role as peace emissary and the dispute between talk radio host Hugh Hewitt and the humble (growing increasingly less humble as the trivia titles continue to mount) gang of bloggers here at Fraters Libertas has been settled amicably.

Brad had been dispatched to Southern California to attempt to talk Hugh down from the arrogant perch of absolute power that he recently ascended to. He managed to infiltrate the sprawling compound where Hugh broadcasts from and was even brought on the air a couple of times to discuss pressing issues of the day with Hugh, mainly focusing on the fracas with Fraters as well as some kind of "recall" thing going on in California.

Brad did a masterful job with Hugh by giving him a graceful out so as not to lose face. You see (wink wink) Hugh was never serious about attempting to wrest control of our site away from us, rather it was merely a test of our mettle (wink wink). Now that we have passed the "test" with flying colors Hugh has reaffirmed our good standing in the formidable Northern Alliance of blogs. I don't know what this says about certain other members of the Alliance whose toadying behavior during the conflict was far from honorable.

The outbreak of peace is, of course, welcome and allows us to avoid unpleasantries that would have resulted if hostilities had continued. For example if Brad had not been able to reason with Hugh and bring him back from the brink, he had instructions to unleash a wave of sabotage at the studio which included spilling Diet Coke, Cheetos, Doritos, and popcorn grease all over Hugh's desk. Employees at the studio would think that a common raccoon had rampaged through the area. Either that or Hugh had been working late again.

It also stops us from once again raising our settlement demands from Hugh. The latest wrinkle was a guaranteed weekly appearance on his show called 'Five Minutes With Fraters: A Segment About Nothing'. Listeners across the country are now breathing a deep sigh of relief.

And I won't have to link to this rather unusual picture of Hugh found at the Chapman University web site. Was that surfer dude bleached blonde really the color of Hugh's hair at one point or was he hitting the Alberto V05 hard in the midst of some sort of mid-life crisis?

Finally we have learned many a valuable lesson from our most recent bout with the powerful, dangerous, and unpredictable Hewitt Empire. Perhaps the most important can be boiled down to "if you want peace, prepare for war". We shall be prepared.