Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Schlemeel, schlemazel, hasenfeffer incorporated

The selections have been announced. The brackets are out. And this Friday the battle to reach the 2006 Frozen Four in Milwaukee begins.

If you prefer to view the college hockey world through maroon and gold colored lens you can get your Panglossian predictions here. But I believe that most of you want the straight scoop on the tournament from a source with a proven track record. That's why you seek the wisdom of The Elder.

The guy who predicted that North Dakota would knock off Wisconsin in the WCHA Final Five semi-final. The guy who assured Mark Yost that St. Cloud State would lose to North Dakota on Saturday night and thus not earn a place in the NCAA tourney. Sure, I was wrong about Friday night's Gopher-SCSU tussle, but I doubt if even the most rabid Husky fan (no pun intended) saw that one coming.

Anyway that was just the warm-ups for the real action that starts Friday. Let's make the rounds.

Last year's all WCHA Frozen Four, and the subsequent whining from all the lesser conferences, led the selection committee to institute an affirmative action policy this time around. They put all four WCHA teams (read the good teams) in two regionals, ensuring that there will be at least two non-WCHA teams in the Frozen Four. Not that it will matter at the end of the day anyway, but it's pretty pathetic when unqualified schools are allowed to play in the Frozen Four in the interests of "fairness." We'll start with the weak sister regionals.

East Regional (Albany)

No. 1 Michigan State vs. No. 4 New Hampshire--One of these years, New Hampshire will put it all together and win the NCAA hockey championship. Right after hell freezes over. Michigan State 4 UNH 2.

No. 2 Harvard vs. No. 3 Maine--For no other reason than my intense loathing of the Black Bears, I'll take the lads of Harvard by a 3-2 score.

Regional Final: Michigan State is closer to being in the WCHA than Harvard, therefore they win 2-1.

Northeast Regional (Worcester)

No. 1 Boston U. vs. No. 4 Nebraska-Omaha--Jack Pah-kahs Terriers have too much bite for the cold Omahaians. BU 5 UNO 3.

No. 2 Miami vs. No. 3 Boston College--Miami of Ohio. 'Nuf said. BC wins 4-3.

Regional Final: Boston's not much of a college town, so this is a tough pick. Let's go with BC 3-2.

Now let's get to the real games.

Midwest Regional (Green Bay)

No. 1 Wisconsin vs. No. 4 Bemidji State--Wisconsin is overrated. Bemidji almost knocked out Denver last year. Still, it's in Green Bay and they are from the premier conference in college hockey. Badgers 4-2.

No. 2 Cornell vs. No. 3 Colorado College--Not one of CC's better teams. But Cornell? The Big Red? Not. CC 3 Cornell 1

Regional Final: An all WCHA affair just as God intended. Wisconsin's a team with a fragile psyche and if the Tigers get up a couple of goals early, Bucky will roll over. But I just don't think this CC team has enough. Badgers punch their ticket to Milwaukee 3-2.

I just realized that so far I'm picking all the top seeds to advance, which is probably a certain kiss of death.

West Regional (Grand Forks)

No. 2 North Dakota vs. No. 3 Michigan

The maize and blue might as well not even take their ugly football-looking helmets out of the bag. The Sioux are not only at home, they're on a roll. And they will roll all over Michigan. Sioux 6 Wolverines 2.

No. 1 Minnesota vs. No. 4 Holy Cross

One of the nice things about the NCAA hockey tournament is learning about quaint schools that you rarely if ever hear anything about. For example, Holy Cross is a Catholic college located in Worcester, Mass and they got into the tourney by virtue of their victory over hockey powerhouse Bentley. Yes, it's a good thing to become more familiar with these smaller programs. And then to kick the living crap out of them. Gophers 19 the politically incorrect Crusaders 2.

By the way, no sooner does the horn sound than you pretty much forget everything about the little school that you've just blown out. Don't believe me? Where in the hell is Mercyhurst at again?

Regional Final: What a showdown. Bitter rivals with long and storied histories meeting for a chance to go to the Frozen Four. Saturday nights in Grand Forks don't get any hotter.

Last year, these two squads met in the Frozen Four (did I mention that it was an all WCHA affair?) with the Sioux coming away victorious. This year, the Gophers have taken three out of four from the Sioux including a sweep up in Grand Forks that marked a turning point in Minnesota's season.

But in playoff hockey, it's all about what have you done for me lately. The Sioux are coming off a WCHA Final Five championship and seem to be jelling at the right time. Their youngsters are really starting to stand out and Parise has been solid, if not spectacular, between the pipes.

The Gophers haven't done much for me lately. Saturday's loss in the third place game doesn't bother me much. Friday night's shootout with St. Cloud State does. Mediocre goaltending and inconsistent, at times lackadaisical defensive play will not get you far in a single elimination tournament. It appeared that the Gophers had tightened up their defensive game and both tenders had strong efforts as the season closed. But the sloppy play and weak goals cropped up again in the playoff series against Anchorage. The Gophers had too much firepower to lose either game to the Seawolves, but there were disquieting signs in the sweep.

Those signs were fully on display on Friday as the Huskies downed the Gophers in OT 8-7. It was a poor defensive effort from top to bottom. Goalies, defensemen, and forwards all bore a share of the blame. After watching that fiasco, I just can't see this squad making the Frozen Four.

Unless of course Briggs steps up and the team plays solid defense. For now, I'll take the team with the mo'. North Dakota 5 Minnesota 3.

Frozen Four

Semis:

Wisconsin versus Michigan State--It kills me to do this, but I'll take the Badgers 2-1.

North Dakota versus Boston U.--A rematch of the '97 title game. Let's go with same result and score. UND 6 BU 4

A rematch of the WCHA Final Five semi-final. Same result, slightly different score. UND 4 Wisconsin 2

That will make it five straight NCAA championships for WCHA schools. The way it should be.

UPDATE--James from No Cal, a guy who actually knows his college puck, e-mails:

Dammit, I was hoping you were going to convince me that the Gophs had a real chance at the Championship. Unfortunately, though I've been a Briggs fan for a couple years now, I have to agree that he's not turned out to be what I hoped. And the Gophs giving up 8 goals to the Huskies was just inexcusable. This was a Husky team that lived and died on defense and couldn't score on Courtney Love. The Gophs got lazy and complacent toward the end of the season. Six games against UAA and UMD do not make you playoff ready.

So you're probably right. Unfortunately. I hope you're wrong (except abooot Maine. God how I hate them), but I fear you're right.

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