Little Women
Last night, as I worked late into the evening editing and re-editing Saint Paul's most recent submission (you just can't have a reference to women of Irish descent in EVERY post), I heard a great commotion outside the sprawling Fraters office compound. I cautiously peered through the blinds, but couldn't see anything unusual at first. Then I directed my eyes downward and recoiled in horror. A mob of short women had gathered, armed with torches and pitchforks, and they were obviously quite agitated. Soon they began to angrily chant:
"Disgusting bigot
against small sizers
bring us the head
of Atomizer!"
So the chickens had finally come home to roost. On Sunday Atomizer had managed to insult about half the women in the United States when he labeled ladies under 5'-4" tall as "dwarves" . These diminutive dames had not taken his remarks lightly and now they wanted blood. Interestingly enough, Atomizer's Mother and girlfriend seemed to be the leaders of the lynch mob.
I violently threw open the shutters and shouted at them:
"You there. What day is it today?"
"Today? Why it's Monday sir", they replied.
"Then you should know that Atomizer has long ago left work and is at Al's Bar as he is every Monday night. Now gather up your rabble and leave me in peace!"
The mob quickly dispersed and soon all I could see were their flickering torches in the distance heading towards Al's. I haven't seen or heard from Atomizer yet today and I fear that he might not have survived the wrath of short women scorned.
I related this tale earlier today to JB Doubtless to get his thoughts, but he merely shrugged and said:
"I don't do dwarves."
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