Fraters Libertas

I Stand By My Statement

Okay, for the record, I did not label all women under 5'-4" tall dwarfs. The statement I made last Sunday regarding the Miss Earth pageant, all 21 words, appears here in its entriety:

In other words, the girls must be young, single, hot, flirtatious and skinny non-dwarves who are currently not in a coma.

From these 21 words in an otherwise brilliant post, it is clear I simply stated that the Miss Earth pageant bars dwarves from entering. The medical definition that I was aware of at the time I posted led me to believe that anyone under the height of 4'-10" is, indeed, a dwarf. I did then and do today consider this definition to be from a reputable source.

By not allowing women under the height of 5'-4" tall into the pageant, they are effectively banning each and every living dwarf from the competition. I repeat, the very rules of the Miss Earth pageant guarantee that the competition will be 100% dwarf free.

Short statured women of the world, your beef is not with me. It is clearly with the pageant organizers, so you can quit following my car to the office every day, you can stop the threatening phone calls at all hours of the night and, for God's sake, you can at least allow me to have a drink at a local tavern without subjecting me to relentless physical assaults. You should see the rage in their little eyes. And those tiny little fists of fury....oh, the humanity!